Bobby Bare Diet Song Lyrics:
Breakfast black coffee one slice of dry toast no
butter no jelly no jam Lunch just some lettuce two
celery stalks no booze no potatoes no ham Dinner
one chicken wing broiled not fried no gravy no
biscuits no pie And this dietin' dietin' dietin'
dietin' sure is a rough way to die So pass me a
carrot stick peel me a prune a glass of skim milk
and that's all Turn off the TV for the Big Mac
commercial it's drivin' me right up the wall And
I'm thinkin' of french fries sausage and waffles
spaghetti and cookies and cake And each night I'm
dreamin' of chocolate ice cream And I'm starvin'
to death when I wake [guitar]
Supper two pieces of cauliflower raw some
beefsteak the size of a nail One sliced tomato a
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small dab of slaw I swear I ate better in jail
Stop eatin' that pizza right under my nose girl
that's the least you can do Put down that candy
bar while I'm singin' I'm starvin' my pants off
for you You're fixin' the kids all those creamed
mashed potatoes But it's bouillon and water for me
Hey you got a lock on the refrigerator Lord knows
where you're hidin' the key While I'm starvin' for
food late at night I'm starvin' for lovin' from
you But you say that when I can see my own dick
you'll be glad to look at it too So pass me a
carrot stick peel me a prune a glass of skim milk
and that's all You and Jane Fonda and old Richard
Simmons are drivin' me right off the wall Now when
I am dead with the insurance paid you'll look down
at me and you'll grin You'll say well the boy
tried and he suffered and died But don't he look
good when he's thin oh my And this dietin' dietin'
dietin' dietin' sure is a rough way to die
Lyrics: Diet Song, Bobby Bare [end]