(We're gonna do this song for Useless2.)

Oh, I was into whips'n'things. She was into pain.
An' I would beat her black an' blue when she called me names.
Chained her to the basement wall where she went insane.
An' I was into whips'n'things. She was into pain.

Oh, Finger Fuckin' Sally worked at Kelly's Bar.
She showed me her titties in Ronny Murphy's car.
She was the first lady to let me go that far.
Finger Fuckin' Sally, down at Kelly's Bar.

An' Pussy Eatin' Pamela went to Elliot High.
Caught her in the bathroom, I thought she would die,
Eatin' Susan's pussy, licked that sucker dry.
Pussy Eatin' Pamela went to Elliot High.

Suck'em Silly Shirley came out after dark.
She would give us head jobs in Centinnial Park.
All the girls would snub her, said she was a narc.
Suck'em Silly Shirley from Centinnial Park.

Yes, good ol' Bloody Mary's on the rag again.
Pussy Eatin' Pamela's got blood on her chin.
Find more similar lyrics on http://mp3lyrics.com/H4TSuck'em Silly Shirley got caught after dark,
Finger Fuckin' Sally in Centinnial Park.

Now Pussy Eat'n' Pamela's in the county jail.
Suck'em Silly Shirley left town on a rail.
They sent Bloody Mary to the pen for life.
An' Finger Fuckin' Sally, she became my wife.

An' I was into whips'n'things. She was into pain.
An' I would beat her black an' blue when she called me names.
Chained her to the basement wall where she went insane.
An' I was into whips'n'things. She was into pain.

WHIPS AND THINGS
Written by: David Allan Coe
Performed by: David Allan Coe
Appears on: Nothing Sacred-1978 (Track 7)1 & 18 X-Rated Hits-1990
(Track 2).

1Transcribed from the track on this album.

2Reports have it that, "Useless," was the name of a friend of a friend,
and a fan, who was at the studio when this song was taped.