Lowell George (dialog)
Jimmy Carl Black (dialog)
Roy Estrada (dialog)
Bunk Gardner (dialog)
Don Preston (dialog)
Motorhead Sherwood (dialog)
Ian Underwood (dialog)
Arthur Tripp (dialog)
Buzz Gardner (dialog)
Frank Zappa (dialog)

Uhh, may I see your papers pleez??
Uhhh, lemme see.
Hand me your suitcase, let me . . . open it.
I'm just a bit nervous you understand.
Open the suitcase.
This hasn't happened . . . too often.
Uh-huh, I see, how many . . .
sixty-two packages of cigarettes.
Why are you carrying all zees
into Germany for? What are you
doing this for?
I . . . I . . .
How long have you been livin' in Berlin?
I don't live in Berlin.
Where do you live?
I live in Texas.
Texas?
Texas.
Oh I see, Lyndon Johnson lives in
Texas too, does he not?
I know, Sure does.
Ooh, hm this is alright.
You mind . . . Is it alright if I
shut my suitcase off?
Shut it off???
Ha, ha ha ha.
Do you care for one of these cigarettes?
Now, who's this lady you are with?
What lady?
This lady here, standing next to you.
Oh, this is uh, this is...
Has she has papers too?
PAPERS! Lemme see your papers!
How come you have to yell so much, what did we do?
I don't yell.
Were just trying to get into the country.
This is my country, it's not your
country, I'm ? here, I've been
standing here for years and years
doing zis every time. You making
me very angry.
Is this ze Fazerland.
This is ze Fazerland yes.
Listen you ought to check all the
Mothers through customs. Hey line
up as soon as you finished . . .
Are you through with me, sir?
You may step over here to the right.
Thank you.
My name is Fritz, open the suitcase please?
Just a moment here, just a moment.
What is this there's sixty two
copies of Horseshit Magazine. What
are you carrying Horseshit
Magazine around for . . .
It's a hoax, hold it, hold it here.
What is this. Right there!
Hold it hold it. I'll never forget you Fritz
Alright, next, you may close this now.
Next whos up, uh, here he comes. Who
are you? Hand me your paper.
Here's my papers
Your name is Duke? What's this
Duke, Duke DeWild. Have you seen
many German movies, you ever go
to ze movies?
I never go to the movies
What is zis, you bring zees
into Germany. Zees are Japanese
tools. Why do you bring
Japanese tools to Germany where
we make the finest tools ever,
you, what are you doingk?
That's 60 marks for you, oh my
God, what's the matter with
you?
(coughing)
Oh my God, please please not here.
Step . . . . Oh my God, what are
you doingk. Oh, who are you, what
is your name, hand me your paper.
Is your name Larry? Larry Frnoga?
Yes.
Larry Frnoga?
Larry Frnoga
Oh my God, what are you doing,
what are you doing zat for?
I'm beating the horse to make it go faster.
That's not a horse that's a table.
What's the difference?
Ha, ha, ha
Don't go too fast, does it, for a table.
What is this? Ohhh, zefrin, CL
brand of ah nasal spray. You
have a cold? How long have you
had a cold?
About a year. (about.)
Find more similar lyrics on http://mp3lyrics.com/VG1You had a cold for a year, are you
trying to bring a cold into zis
country. Oh my God don't cough on
me. What is this medal say. Sais
Berlin survival award 1968.
That's where I got my cold.
You were here before in Berlin.
That's right.
What, what were you doing in Berlin?
I gave a concert
You gave a concert in Berlin?
That's right.
To whom?
The German people.
The German people
Yes.
Don't take the German people
lightly, I say, who is this man
here, is it Arthur, Arthur Tripp
Arthur, Arthur
It's a German name is it not?
English
Tripp?
Ja.
Tripp?
Ja, JA?!
Ja, ja-ja...
Stop giggling, you're having
too much fun, you know we
arrest people for having to
much fun here.
I beg your pardon.
When you come to someone elses
country do you run around on the
grass and make it dirty everywhere
you go?
No, I stick pretty close to the bars.
You know you people all look... bars?
We have a lot of bars here
Ysure do. Heh-heh, scuze me if I laugh.
Don't laugh.
Alright I'll do that.
Who is this man here, the other man?
He's our leader.
He is your leader?
Ja.
Wh-what is his function and how does he lead you?
He directs us by with signals various vocal noises.
Vocal noises? Vat are some of the noises?
Eh, peep.
Peep?
Poowah.
Pooowahhhhhh
I see you all are very well
organised, we all like order in
Germany you know. You have such
a pleasant smile, may I see
your papers?
You see I don't exactly have my papers with me I.
You don't have papers?
I may have left them in my other bag.
He has no papers huh.
He has no papers.
I mean if there was something I could do for you.
Do you have any identification.
Identification, lemme see.
It's a nice watch you have on.
Wa ist los?
It used to have a Mickey Mouse there, I...
I tell you what I'll do.
If if if you give me zat watch.
Nein.
That's a very strange german accent.
Ja ha ha ha.
Are you sure . . .
Are you from Strabourg or was
He's a russian spy, he's a Russian I think.
I think so.
Get Him.
Hands Up!
Oh God.
What's goin on?
You want an enema?
No I'll take a cheeseburger.
Why is the bow-tie goink from your neck.
I'm practicing to fly.
Why is everyone in this group having
bow ties going from ze neck?
They're all weird.
Gimme your watch.
I still don't trust this guys accent.
Who is this, who, who? Come here,
come over here. Do you have a
suitcase.
We must watch this one.
We must watch this one, right.
Let's open the suitcase.
Awright. What is this, oh, you too
carry many cigarette. What is this
lyrics. Ah these are lyrics:
My guitar wants to kill you mama
My guitar wants to burn your dad
I get real mean when he makes me mad
This is very good, this is very
normal, German lyrics. You're all
welcome to our country.
Ha ha ha.
Don't laugh.