I, Ludicrous Preposterous Tales Lyrics:
Hello Ken.
Well, here we are again.
Another Friday night.
I heard someone singing about you on the radio.
Well, what can I get you? that´s two light and bitters then.
Before you start Ken, let's keep it clean.

I went out with a famous DJ's sister's friend.
I was on Crackerjack at the age of ten (oh really?)
And I saw The Sex Pistols play down at The 100 Club (yeah we all did)
And I spent New Year's Eve at Sensible's den.

Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken MacKenzie
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken MacKenzie

Whoa, you´re drinking fast tonight Ken!
Well, I´ve been a bit off me beer since you gave me that home brew.
What did you put inside it? Neat alcohol?
I like a strong beer Ken, but that was ridiculous.

I lost a thousand pounds playing brag lasy night (come off it Ken)
And I flew to Amsterdam to start a riot (oh really?)
And I once saw the Palace score four goals away from home (oh yeah? four?)
And I´ve won every game of Trivial Pursuit I´ve ever played (you haven´t played me Ken)

Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
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Preposterous tales in the pub with Ken MacKenzie
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken MacKenzie

Same old stories eh, Ken?
Ken's been drinking heavily again.
Nothing changes.
Is it my round again? I thought I got the last one?
How much money did you bring out with you?
I´ve got me cashpoint card if necessary (if necessary?)
So c'mon, let's have some more yarns.

I once ate six Mars Bars in half-an-hour.
While working on a site I unearthed a bomb (did you Ken?)
And I once had a shower with two American girls. (what?)
(what? at the same time Ken? Arrrr, that´s preposterous!)

Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken MacKenzie
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken MacKenzie

Well, I´ve got nothing left to say Ken.
Well, let's have one for the road (oh, why not!)

Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken MacKenzie
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales (now then, now then)
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken MacKenzie

C'mon Ken, time to go.
Oh, it´s a late bar tonight.
Did I tell you about the time I apprehended a mugger outside Brixton Tube?
(we've heard it all before!)
What do you mean you don´t believe me!
it´s true! it´s true, man! Everything I say is true!
(yeah, yeah. I don´t believe you Ken)
Lyrics: Preposterous Tales, I, Ludicrous [end]